I haven’t been my Self lately


I just finished watching a movie about how everything is connected and we’re all part of the fabric of the universe. It starred Dustin Hoffman and Lily Tomlin and Jude Law and Jason Schwartsman and a few others (including the very yummy Naomi Watts). I can’t bring myself to type the name because it’s one of those stupid titles that uses a symbol instead of a real word. If I had a friggin valentine on my keyboard I’d tell you what the name is.

Anyway, all that aside, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the interconnectedness of everything, and how we’re all really Energy and Spirit, etc., and that the physical forms we interact with every day are just illusions.

Some days, I don’t know what to think. I feel disconnected. I feel like I don’t fit in. I feel like no one understands me and I don’t understand anyone else. And I’m sure lots of people feel the same way. But then I think, ya, that’s all part of the illusion, too. My feelings are just illusions.

Can I accept that? Can I accept that there are important things, like my feelings and my beliefs about reality, things that make up who I am – that these things are just illusions? That I am just an illusion?

Who am I, really?

And the question that the movie asked, that I still don’t get, is:

How am I not myself?

Can anyone explain that last question to me?

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About Craig

Craig lives in Calgary, Alberta.
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